Jeff becomes obsessed with a woman whose leg he has admired from afar on the train. Faced with a chance to meet her, and the need to explain his delight at finding she has a second leg, he comes up with the lie that he is an amputee. Yet once she takes an interest, how is he ever to follow up? Then again, Sally is dating a surgeon, so ... Written by Andrea

Susan's sexually frank parents are coming to dinner, and Steve's worried. Seeing a nature TV show with Susan that talks about the need for the male of the species to continue to enjoy himself doesn't exactly help. Patrick and Jeff become obsessed with, shall we say, publicity rights. Meanwhile, Jane has discovered a talent for identifying people's ideal celebrity friend just by looking at them, and she has a surefire technique for meeting and befriending those celebrities. TV news presenter Mariella Frostrup stars as herself ... though her cellphone seems to be having an identity crisis. Written by Andrea

It's time for Susan and Steve to redecorate the flat, but that's going to mean Steve achieving the biologically impossible: a man having an opinion about fabric. His dilemma is made no easier when, dropping by Susan's apartment unannounced, he gets a view of Sally that opens his eyes to the beauty that is Australia. Patrick is having car trouble, or so he says. And Jeff's old buddy Captain Subtext is there to explain it all. Written by Andrea

Patrick and Sally each discuss with their friends the bedroom disaster of the previous episode, in which Patrick encountered a problem entirely new to him. Jeff takes this opportunity to explain to Patrick the ways of The Melty Man, who comes to do his evil work inside your terrified pants. Emboldened by a talk with her girlfriends, Sally visits Patrick's apartment determined to prove that what happened is no reflection on her -- and Patrick wants to do the same for himself. Written by Andrea

After getting herself fired from her radio job as a traffic reporter, Jane invents a sock puppet named Jake the Snake in preparation to launch a career in children's TV. Jake's honesty, though, could cost Jane her friends. Back at the bar, Patrick has an ingenious plan to dump his girlfriend for rejecting any hope of a threesome, a plan which backfires when she arrives in mid-phone call with the news she's changed her mind. Written by Andrea

Invited to a wedding as a couple Steve is worried that this will encourage Susan to want to marry him whilst Jane and Sally are perturbed that the bride is younger than them. Susan asks Jane how she can get Steve to commit and learns that Jane takes great delight in making prank phone calls to him and uses this to phone him, making him believe her to be Jane. When he at last confesses that he would like to marry her Susan cries Gotcha! Written by don @ minifie-1

When Patrick needs a pretend wife to show off to his colleague Ivan, Sally agrees to take the job, only to be abruptly fired in favor of Susan. As Steve struggles to reclaim his someday-will be-almost-possible fiancée, Jane faces her own crisis when her choice of fashions for a party leave her feeling just a little underdressed for the occasion. Written by Andrea

Jeff meets co-worker Julia and is interesting in going out with her as she is with him. Jeff explains his ineptitude to Steve and Patrick at asking women out. Elsewhere, Julia explains her ineptitude at being asked out to Susan, Jane, and Sally. Neither the guys nor the girls are aware of who the love interest is. Written by Patrick

Jeff brags about his three days-'old' hot relationship with his and Susan's boss Julia. The mates burst his bubble about female attire, supposedly growing from sexy scanty to giant put-off, like their attitude. Steve and Susan seem a working couple, as he leaves every decision to her, but each secretly misses his/her freedom. In a bar, Steve can't resist saying 'no' when Yvonne asks if he has a girl-friend and exchanging phone numbers. He freaks with the mates eight days later when he gets a call presumably from her, the only consolation being Susan isn't home, and pretends with an Aussie accent to by Dick Darlington, who works in an equally fictitious but nearby bar, at Jeff's impulsive prompting called Susan's and for Australians -her well-known sexual obsession- who all 'know' Susan Walker, relieved to hear it's some French bitch, Susan's client Giselle. In fact it's Susan pretending to be Giselle while she resists flirting in another bar with real Australian Richard. In fact the ... Written by KGF Vissers