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Peter's attempts to become physically fit lead to a friendship with Bill Clinton, which inadvertently nearly destroys Peter and Lois' marriage.
All Episodes - S05
EPS01
Stewie suddenly begins to appreciate everything his mother does for him and feels deeply affected to her. Lois is content at first, but as Stewie's affection grows close to manic - with Stewie being on her back 24/7 and threatening Brian to stop hitting on her - she becomes worn out. Meanwhile, Peter goes to see his doctor to get a flu vaccine because of a current wave of infections. While there, his doctor finds out Peter has never had a prostrate exam, so he recommends his to perform one. Peter agrees, not knowing how it works and feeling raped when his doctor tries to examine him. When he finds out all his friends have had the same experience, he decides to sue his doctor for rape. Written by Keydel, Philipp
EPS02
When Peter's mom starts dating news anchor Tom Tucker, he turns to him as the father figure; Brian and Stewie begin hosting their own raunchy radio program.
EPS03
Meg takes a job at a new superstore, which causes Peter to lose his job and the town's electricity.
EPS04
Stewie and Brian join the army and are sent to Iraq; Chris becomes the lead singer of a rock band.
EPS05
Lois does Peter's work at the brewery while he recovers from getting his fingers surgically reattached, and Brian doesn't want the family to know that he's dating an idiot.
EPS06
Lois becomes the high school sex ed teacher, but is fired for having radical views. So she is replaced by a Christian group that uses fear, misinformation and lies to promote abstinence.
EPS07
Stewie tries to win over a retired child actress, and Peter becomes a fan of chick movies and makes his own.
EPS08
Meg can't find a date to her junior prom, and even though he is dating Jillian, Brian ends up going with Meg. At the prom, Brian gets drunk to make the night pass, but ends up making out with Meg. Meg begins to think of Brian as her boyfriend and becomes obsessed with spending every moment with him. Meanwhile, Peter, Cleveland and Quagmire join the police force to help Brian. Written by freddyjasonmyer
EPS09
Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale. Stewie, who is upset with Brian, takes him cross country to Colorado to find his beloved teddy, and ends up having a ski-off to win back Rupert. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around. Written by freddyjasonmyer
EPS10
Peter and Lois upset Meg when they forget that her 17th birthday is a few days away. They hastily plan a birthday party that Meg complains she won't want to be seen at. Peter gets drunk and makes a fool out of himself. Eventually, he dresses up as a hobo clown and attempts to drive a unicycle down a set of stairs, but he is unable to control the unicycle and falls over the banister, landing on top of his father Francis, one of the party guests. Francis is critically injured with multiple injuries; with the family surrounding him, he briefly awakens to tell Peter You're a fat, stinking drunk! Francis dies immediately thereafter. Peter is depressed over his father's death and attempts to turn to crack. Eventually, Brian refers Peter to a hypnotherapist, who gets Peter to reveal that Francis is not his biological father. Peter visits Thelma, who admits that he was conceived while she had an affair with an Irishman 40 years earlier and that he (the father) has remained in Ireland. Brian... Written by Brian Rathjen briguy_52732@yahoo.com
EPS11
Peter becomes the neighborhood bully after trying to take care of Chris's bully, and Stewie has a cancer scare after staying in the tanning bed too long.
EPS12
Peter becomes a redneck and gets Quagmire fired. So the gang sets out to get Quagmire his job back.
EPS13
Peter's attempts to become physically fit lead to a friendship with Bill Clinton, which inadvertently nearly destroys Peter and Lois' marriage.
EPS14
After Peter finds a valuable coin and sells it for $50,000, he opens his own restaurant, but things don't end well when he bans Joe and all of his handicapped friends.
EPS15
Lois gets a job as the church organist, so the family decides to begin going back to church. When Stewie gets sick after receiving communion, the congregation becomes convinced that he has been possessed by the devil. While on the run, the family ends up in Texas, where Peter begins to fit right in with the cowboys, Stewie enters the Little Miss Texas pageant, and Chris and Meg sneak into George W. Bush's house. Written by freddyjasonmyer
EPS16
After being expelled by his school for dragging down their average standardized test scores, Chris is accepted into a snobby private school, which forces his family to struggle to pay the tuition.
EPS17
Lois runs for mayor of Quahog, though she doesn't become the front-runner until she dumbs down her political views. Once in office, she becomes corrupted with the power that she now holds, and begins accepting bribes so that she can buy herself expensive things. Meanwhile, Peter comes to enjoy being the first lady of Quahog, and all of the perks that go along with it. Written by freddyjasonmyer
EPS18
Death grants Peter's wish to go back in time to 1984 to be 18 again, but when he bails on Lois, he soon learns he's alters the present, where Lois is married to Quagmire. Written by freddyjasonmyer