Granny receives a box from Cousin Pearl in the hills. One of the items in the box is an old fashioned crank telephone. Granny asks Jethro to hook it up to a party line on the pole so she can listen in on the party line.

Granny despairs of Elly Mae ever finding a husband and decides to promote her non-existent cooking skills. She is entered into a TV show cook-off, but nothing she fixes is edible.

Jethro is in love with Susie, the carhop waitress at the local drive-in, but Susie keeps rejecting his advances. Jed advises a dejected Jethro to take dating advice from Dash Riprock, the movie star/playboy neighbor to the Clampetts. Dash advises Jethro to buy a convertible, invite Susie to go on a double date with Elly Mae and him, and even lets Jethro use his bachelor pad. Despite Dash's efforts, Jethro still can't get past his hillbilly ways to Susie's heart. Written by bossboy31

Two con artists arrive separately intent on getting some of the Clampett cash. Colonel Foxhall turns the charm on Granny while Emmaline seems to be a simple hill lass with a cuckoo clock who moves into the mansion. Jethro falls in love again. Written by rharlan58

Jethro decides to sophisticate Emaline but she has bigger plans for blackmailing Mr. Drysdale with her cuckoo clock camera. The colonel continues to woo Granny. The two swindlers though haven't met someone as sharp as Jed.

Jethro is chopping wood while a chimpanzee named May Bell watches. He wishes that he could teach May Bell to chop wood. When Elly May comes by, she and Jethro talk and decide that they want a gorilla.

The Clampetts miss Herbie and ask Mr. Drysdale to get the tame gorilla back. The banker promises to help but actually hinders the effort.

Granny's soap making sends noxious smoke into the air, which gets the attention of smog commissioner Tinsley. He shuts down the operation and Jed decides to run against him when he misunderstands Mr. Drysdale's advice.

Out-of-work vaudeville team Marvin and Marita offer Granny free in-home dance lessons in a scheme to get a foot in the door and hopefully sell the Clampetts additional lessons. Believing the schemers have lost their lease on their dance school, Jed and Granny generously offer to have Marvin and Marita bring their other [non-existent] students to the Clampett mansion. This episode offers a couple of good jokes, a wink and a nod to the brother and sister vaudeville dance team of Buddy and Vilma Ebsen, and ends with Jed's tap routine at the Bankers Convention Variety Show. Written by Jeff Hole

Feeling idle, Jed takes a job as a sanitation engineer (garbage man). Mr. Drysdale, fearing potential embarrassment, convinces John Brewster to put Jed to work on the board of directors of O.K. Oil Company. After the set up, the episode becomes rather random, with Brewster discovering that oil losses are due to the Beverly Hills section of a pipeline having been accidentally tapped by the Clampetts and the episode ending with the Clampetts converting the O.K. Oil company jet to a commercial carrier (with Jethro as pilot and Granny a swill-serving stewardess). Written by Jeff Hole

Cushing makes another attempt to get the Clampetts to move their money to his bank by romancing Granny. When Drysdale learns of this, he decides to bring his father-in-law Lowell Farquhar, who had once dated Granny, to draw Granny away from Cushing. Written by rcs0411@yahoo.com

Gloria Swanson and Drysdale are doing some business which involves her selling her house and some of her possessions and donating the proceeds to charity and then she is moving East. When the Clampetts read about her moving away, Jethro who heard the story that she's auctioning off her things, thinks that she's broke and that she's being forced to sell her possessions. Granny being a big fan is heart broken. They go to see her and try to lift up her spirits by saying they like her movies and that they're still being shown in their hometown. Jed decides to ask Chapman, who runs his movie studio, to make a silent movie with Swanson in it. Written by rcs0411@yahoo.com

Jethro is so desperate to meet a woman that when Miss Hathaway's bird watching group arrives, he goes out of his way to try to impress the women.

Flatt and Scruggs are visiting to film a TV commercial for a detergent. Commodore Ratterman thinks the Clampett authenticity would help sell the soap. He doesn't count on their honesty or Jethro's incompetence as a director.

Granny is feeling blue as Christmas approaches, and Jed reckons to make Christmas more like it was back home by doing something special for a neighbor - Mrs. Drysdale. Thinking the Drysdales are broke, the Clampetts decide to buy back Mrs. Drysdale's Christmas rummage sale donations as a gift, and in order to do so they take seasonal jobs in a department store (Jethro is the store Santa), where among other things, they manage to get Mrs. Drysdale arrested for shoplifting. The episode ends with all of the regular cast singing We Wish You a Merry Christmas to the TV audience. Written by Jeff Hole

Mr. Drysdale hatches a crazy advertising scheme that includes Martians descending into the Rose Bowl on New Year's Day in a balloon modified to look like a flying saucer. Drysdale hires three Italian midgets - The Flying Montenaros - to play the little green men, dresses them in Martian costumes, and hides them along with the flying saucer in his back yard. Nosy Granny discovers Drysdale's little green house guests and they are eventually invited to the Clampett mansion for victuals... Granny has some good lines in this one. Written by Jeff Hole

Amos Wentworth Hogg, Mayor of Bug Tussle, travels to Beverly Hills to visit the Clampetts with hopes of raising money to cover an embezzlement debt. The Clampetts, however, believe he has eyes for Granny.

Feeling old and unneeded, Granny decides to retire from doctorin' and move back home with her share of the Clampett fortune. Mr. Drysdale convinces Dr. Clyburn to help him in a scheme to make Granny feel needed and to keep her (and her millions) in Beverly Hills. Written by Jeff Hole

Feeling burdened by their wealth, Jed and Granny decide to donate all of their millions to a young woman seeking funds for a phony foundation for needy UCLA college students. Heading back home, the Clampetts run out of fuel before they get out of Los Angeles and decide to make the best out of the situation and to clear part of a park and take up sharecropping. Written by Jeff Hole

Granny misinterprets a phone call from Cousin Pearl and believes Indians have attacked in Bug Tussle and have taken over Clampett land. In reality, there is a simple boundary dispute, and when Chief Running Wolf and Little Fox travel to Beverly Hills to settle the dispute with Jed, Granny prepares for an all-out Indian war and Mr. Drysdale goes to war to protect the Clampett fortune. John Wayne visits Granny at the end after the Indians attack. Written by Jeff Hole

Granny decides to distill a match-making potion for Jed. When that fails, she follows Jethro to a computer dating service. As the dates arrive at the Clampett mansion, there is a mix-up between who is to see Jed and who is to see Jethro. In the end, everyone gets a date. Written by Jeff Hole

After reading the Society page Granny decides to best way to get Elly a husband is to throw her a coming out party, complete with possum burgers and gopher gravy. Mrs. Drysdale, hoping to forever humiliate them, is all too happy to help.

Jethro decides to get a job and he goes to the studio to become a director or a producer. But once he sees the way women flock around a famous matador, he decides that he'll become a bull fighter. Jethro wants El Magnifico to teach him how to become a bull fighter, but the matador is more interested in Elly May. She doesn't cotton to way he treats his critters, though. Written by Dionysius Exiguus

The Clampketts come across Narda and Yerko, two gypsies, who decide to run a scam on the unsuspecting clan. Involving both a marriage prophecy and and a curse, the crooks see the families 's naivety to their advantage.

The Clampetts are visited by a real king, Alexander so Granny and Mrs. Drysdale start matchmaking. The broke royal needs a wealthy bride and courts Ellie. Drysdale niece Doreen is tricked by a costumed Jethro and ends up unimpressed.

The Drysdales have temporary custody of a baby hippo and when Granny spots it she thinks it's a giant hog. She makes plans for turning into future meals while Ellie sees it as another pet.

Granny continues her doctoring and is especially pleased with her new batch of tonic. Dr. Clyburn is determined to get her to stop so invites her to his office to show her how modern medicine works. Granny has other ideas.

Country music legends Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs visit the Clampetts while Lester's citified wife, Gladys, heads to Mammoth Studios for a screen test directed by Jethro (at Lester's request).

The Clampetts agree to watch their banker's nephew Milby but they don't know he's spoiled rotten. His behavior tests the patience of all, especially Granny who has a few ideas on teaching him manners.

Mrs. Drysdale's dahlias spark a feud with the Clampett's when Margaret Drysdale accuses Granny of theft.